All too well, I remember the pain of wanting just to be normal. In my mind, my scars prevented me from living the life that I had imagined for myself. I wanted to be accepted and loved by society. Oh, how I wanted to fit in. The shame of not fitting in and not being considered normal was heartbreaking.
So many times, I felt excluded. Especially when someone said something to put me down. While people often felt sorry for me and expressed their pity to me, they still put me down. I remember thinking that I would finally fit in when my books were published. Then someone told me, “It’s great that you can write with your disabilities.” It occurred to me then that I didn’t want to fit in.
Why should I want to fit in with a society that judges others based on appearance and ability? Why should I expect others to love and accept me when they struggle to love themselves? Instead of wanting to fit in with this world, I invited others into my world, where God is the ruler.
In my world, we don’t seek a perfect life but a perfect God. We know that we are all beautifully flawed, and we realize that the love and acceptance we truly need are inside us. In God’s eyes, everyone fits in. We are all His children. No one is an outcast. God deeply loves us all. Our worth is not based on our appearance, body size, home, or bank account. It is based on God’s love for us. He died for us before we were even born. Nothing we have done or could ever do will separate us from His love.
No one else ever gets to decide our worth! It was decided the day that Jesus died for us on the cross. Other people’s opinions of me no longer matter to me. Regardless of what I do or don’t do, some people will like me, and others won’t. And I’m okay with that. I want God to be satisfied with me, and I want to love myself.
The most incredible life we can live is integrity and love. If we could all live by these two verses in Mark 12:30-31 (KJV), our world would be one of love.
Mark 12:30-31 (KJV)
30 And thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind, and with all thy strength: this is the first commandment.
31 And the second is like, namely this, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these.