When Perfection Fails, Grace Prevails

• By candidasullivan
• October 30, 2026
• No Comments

Are you a perfect Christian? 

I tried to be. I thought that when I got saved, I could live up to this wonderful, majestic, Jesus-like standard. And oh my, I failed and fell short. The failure made me want to try harder. I would pray more, read my Bible more, and if I put in enough effort, maybe, just maybe, I could get there. 

I remember a conversation I had with a woman who told me she had never questioned God or tried to pray away her hardships. I felt like such a failure. She endured great hardships without even wishing things would be different, and I had spent my life praying for God to change my circumstances. 

Those kinds of encounters made me wonder what was wrong with me. Why couldn’t I get it together and walk perfectly for my Lord? 

When we compare our stories with others, we can feel inadequate. We might feel that we need to be stronger than we are. But I love this moment with Jesus and His Father that we got to witness. Jesus expressed His desire for the cup to pass from Him, while surrendering to His Father’s will. We too can ask God to change our circumstances while still surrendering to His will.

Matthew 26:39 KJV

³⁹ And he went a little farther, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt.

I wanted to be the kind of woman Proverbs 31 describes. Oh, how I wanted my husband and children to call me blessed. While they were probably silently calling me other words that start with a b, I don’t think blessed was one of them. 

It reminds me of the time when I wanted my house to sparkle because it was so clean. I wanted to see my reflection in my perfectly shined sink bowls. I nearly drove myself crazy wiping those sink bowls, only to walk by five minutes later and discover dirty dishes covering them. 

I remember a particular walk with the Lord when I cried the whole time, telling Him that if everyone knew about me, they wouldn’t be inspired. Repelled would be more like it. I listed all of my faults and failures and told Him all my imperfections. I built quite the case for disqualification. 

I expected God to say, “You’re right. I was wrong about you. I can’t use someone who has dirty sink bowls.” But He didn’t. God knew I couldn’t make myself perfect through my own efforts. That’s why I need His grace. Not so I can stop growing, but so I can stop trying to earn His love while I grow.

God knows all about the dirt in me. He knows every sin I have ever committed and the ones still to come. When I feel like I’m reaching a certain level of perfection, I might look down on someone who sins differently than I do. Trying to live in perfection is impossible, but living through grace shows others a glimpse of the Lord.

Sweet friends, that’s one reason I share my tender moments with you. I know someone out there thinks they need to be perfect to worship and serve the Lord. Some people can truly make it look so easy. But we don’t know what goes on behind the scenes or deep in the heart. She might be showing a perfect example while crumbling inside.  

We were at the beach once, and I watched a woman with two kids do a photoshoot. She was yelling at the kids. She mumbled inaudible things under her breath, but right before the picture was taken, they all smiled and looked so happy. Then, once the perfect picture was snapped, the frustration returned. I watched it all unfold with awe. Those pictures would probably go on social media with a beautiful caption, but no one would see behind the scenes.

And honestly, I related to the woman. It was like God let me watch a clip that could have been me. She yelled. The kids cried. She yelled again. They were all upset. Watching them, I wondered how often my own desire for everything to look perfect had stolen the joy from moments I could never get back. And it made me wonder what they will remember when they look at the pictures years later. Will they remember the smiles in the pictures, or the frustration surrounding them?

When we let the desires of the flesh override the desires of our hearts, we cause pain for ourselves and others. This surface-level desire for perfection is our flesh trying to prove its worthiness. We want others to think we have it all together and that we are somehow worthy of God’s goodness.

But it’s not about us or our goodness. It’s about God. His grace extends that goodness to us. It’s not our righteousness. Through our own efforts, we cannot compensate for our sin or make ourselves acceptable to God.

In some ways, I think that was my intention even though I didn’t understand it at the time. I needed to prove my worth, to show I was good enough to live the precious life God had given me, and that He wasn’t wrong to spare me. That I deserved the beautiful life that others with Amniotic Band Syndrome never got to live. I wanted to excel at motherhood to prove I deserved my kids. To be a good wife, so my husband wouldn’t wish he had chosen someone else. To follow the Lord and write so well that He would never take away my gift and give it to someone else. 

2 Corinthians 12:9 KJV

⁹ And he said unto me, My grace is sufficient for thee: for my strength is made perfect in weakness. Most gladly therefore will I rather glory in my infirmities, that the power of Christ may rest upon me.

But I didn’t earn any of those things. Everything I have is by God’s grace. 

When I get into that mindset, everything feels like a gift from God. I don’t need to be perfect to accept the gift. I can accept it with gratitude and humility. Knowing that it came from a perfect God and love. 

If you watch me long enough, I will mess up. That truth used to paralyze me. It made it hard to write. What if I got it wrong? What if I said something I shouldn’t? What if I misunderstood scripture or shared something that changed someone’s opinion about me? I used to take all of this fear into my writing sessions. I carefully tiptoed around every word. 

But here’s what I learned. 

God called me to write. He knew all about my imperfections. He wants me to be truthful and real. To tell what it’s really like, not some polished version meant to make you in awe of me. If my words inspire anyone, it’s because God has given me a story to share and the grace to tell it. I can receive it with gratitude and humility, knowing it comes from a perfect God who loves me.

Sweet friend, you don’t have to be a perfect Christian to love and serve a perfect God. You don’t have to hide every mistake or pretend you have it all together. You can acknowledge your imperfections, repent when you’ve done wrong, and allow God’s grace to help you grow.

We aren’t here to convince the world that we’re perfect.

We’re here to point them toward the One who is.