Turning Aggravation Into Growth: How to Respond When Others Make You Mad

• By candidasullivan
• July 31, 2026
• No Comments

Do other people make you mad?

I wish I could tell you no, but that would be a lie. Right now, I could create you a big, long list of situations and people that aggravate me. Lately, it’s gotten worse. I find myself increasingly aggravated by things beyond my control. 

I can try to change others and circumstances. 

I can let their behavior affect me. 

I can become bitter and angry when I can’t change them. 

Or. And this is a really big or. 

While I can’t change their behavior, or my initial feeling, I can change my reaction to it. And that’s where the power is. God gave us the power of choice. We all have free will. We all get to choose our own behavior. 

We might not have chosen the hurt, but we can decide to feed it. 

Do I replay the conversation over and over?

Do I imagine their motives?

Do I tell others what they did?

Do I build a case against their character?

Do I secretly hope something teaches them a lesson?

Or do I bring the anger to God and say:

“Lord, I’m angry. Help me know what to do with this.”

Ephesians 4:26 KJV

26 Be ye angry, and sin not: let not the sun go down upon your wrath:

The danger isn’t simply experiencing anger. It’s what anger becomes when we nurture it.

Anger can become bitterness. It can turn into contempt. Make us want to gossip or even retaliate. But it can also serve as a signal that leads us to God.

Maybe the goal isn’t to never feel angry. The goal is to stop letting anger dictate what we do.

We can’t help how people treat us, but we do get to decide what we are going to do about it. We can pause in the discomfort and pray. When we invite God into the problem and decision-making, we will make the best choice. 

The enemy wants us to nurture anger and aggravation constantly. He will slip in every situation and influence our thoughts. He wants us to fight with everyone all the time. Even if we don’t fight, he wants us to be hateful and harbor negative thoughts about other people. 

That’s not who I want to be. I don’t want to become bitter and angry. I don’t want always to be teetering on the edge of coming unglued. So when negative thoughts about a person or situation arise, I need to choose to deal with them right there. 

I need to share it with God and ask for guidance and a Godly perspective. I need to sit with God in the discomfort. My problem is really how their behavior makes me feel. 

Their behavior may be their responsibility. What happens in my heart afterward is mine. I can bring the hurt to God and let Him show me how to respond without allowing someone else’s behavior to change who I am.

I don’t have to become something ugly because someone treated me ugly. I can choose to let God use even the hurt to make me more like Him.