Have you silently quit?

• By candidasullivan
• March 15, 2024
• No Comments

Whew! This one is hard to write. I will take you back a few years when I silently quit on the things most important to me, and my life fell apart. I wouldn’t wish that pain on anyone, yet part of me knows someone is headed in that direction. I’m putting my ego aside and sharing my biggest failures with you, hoping it will help you redirect before you hit rock bottom, too.

The scary part is that I didn’t realize I was quitting. It wasn’t one big moment. Had I known, I would have fought harder not to quit. But it was so subtle that I didn’t notice. Until I found myself at rock bottom, with more pain than I could handle; all areas of my life were on fire, and I didn’t know what to do.

It started with little things. I spent more time with others and zoning out on social media than with God. I stopped writing and creating. I allowed other people and their priorities before my time with God and the work He put on my heart to do.

I stopped trying. I only did enough to get by in all areas of my life. I figured out my most minuscule amount of effort, and that’s what I did. I gave as little as possible to everyone and even less to myself. I was so empty that, in truth, I didn’t have anything to offer.

Most days, I felt as if I was barely getting by. I procrastinated, ignored, and stuffed all of my feelings inside. I put little effort into anything because I thought I had nothing to give. I was burned out and felt like I was dying inside.

I often whispered the words, “I don’t know what to do,” “I can’t take this anymore,” and “I don’t care.”

Now, I know I felt that way because I wasn’t progressing in my life. I was merely treading water daily, trying to keep my head above the water, which was exhausting.

Something shocking happened that almost resulted in an unimaginable loss. I won’t go into all the details because it involves others, but it shook me. It forced me to see where I was and then pray for the strength to rebuild my life.

I started taking life coaching training. Someone needed help, and I was determined to do everything I could to help them. What I didn’t realize at the time was that I needed it, too. I cried the day I evaluated my life on the Wheel of Life exercise. For the first time, I saw how bad it all was. In my honest vulnerability, I noticed that my wheel was unbalanced and almost flat. No wonder I could barely do anything; I was running on empty.

Instead of putting it off, I prayed that day. I asked God to help me rebuild my life to help others do the same. I started with my relationship with God. If I could get things fixed with God, He would show me how to fix everything else.

I walked, prayed, and cried a lot. I also listened to audiobooks about things I was struggling with. It was a slow process but rewarding. We can’t lead others to where we won’t go ourselves. If we barely survive, we can’t inspire others to live inspired by God. We can’t live a meaningful, fulfilled life by running on empty.

One of the greatest pains I have experienced is giving up on myself. I never want to go back to that place again, so now I journal every day and have conversations with God. I don’t want to wake up one day on rock bottom again. So, I’m mindful of my actions.

I know that to feel good every day, I need to make progress in my life. I need to learn how to do the things I don’t want to do, become disciplined, and go to the Lord for my orders for the day. When God helps me with my to-do list, He gives me things to help me grow, feel good, and ultimately become the person He created me to be.

God can help us with any struggle. Faith is realizing we can’t do it on our own. Courage is asking God to help us. Strength is taking the first step, regardless of how hard it seems. Trust is knowing that God will do what is best for us.

We only get one life, sweet friends. Let’s rise today and start living again. If you need help, please email me (candidasullivan@yahoo.com) or contact me on Facebook.