We Can’t Heal What We Won’t Feel

• By candidasullivan
• July 14, 2025
• No Comments

We can’t heal what we won’t feel.

I know it is so tempting to ignore those painful feelings. We want to stuff them down inside of us and pretend they don’t exist. When someone asks us how we are doing, we want to reply okay, and truly mean it.

But the truth is that we are not okay. We are hurting, but we pretend the pain isn’t real. We push it away and save it for another day, which is why it lingers and hurts us daily.

While it’s uncomfortable, the best thing we can do is sit with God in our pain. When we tell God what is hurting us without any filters or lies, He will help us. Sometimes, just talking about it honestly helps us release it. Other times, God might give us a new perspective on it all. Changing our thoughts about things can release the pain.

Anytime we believe something shouldn’t have happened, we cause ourselves pain. While we might not have wanted it to happen, the truth is that it did. We can start healing when we can accept that it did happen and it was supposed to happen (because it did).

Our flesh likes to hold onto the pain. Sometimes it feels like we are honoring those we have lost by holding onto them. But the greatest honor is in letting them go. We let them rest in God’s incredible peace, knowing that nothing or no one can ever hurt them again.

Yes, we miss them. But when we choose to remember the good moments, we allow their memory to live without the pain attached to it.

God can help us with this. The Bible tells us that Jesus wept, so He understands our pain. When we sit with Him and ask Him to help us overcome the pain, He will.

I’ve heard my daddy preach that death is the door to Heaven. When I can truly see it that way, my heart can let go. To those who are saved by God’s amazing grace, death is a great thing.

Sweet friends, I know it hurts. I don’t pretend to know all the answers, but I know the One who does. When God changes our perspective, He releases the pain. He did this for me with my scars. For so long, I thought it shouldn’t have happened to me. But with one thought, God changed everything for me and released the pain I had carried for decades.

God released decades of pain for me with one thought that has never returned. He also turned my pain into blessings. Now, when I think about my scars, my heart fills with joy that I survived the attack, instead of pain.

God turned my sorrow into joy. He is all-powerful and can do the same for you. It’s not His will that we carry the pain. He wants us to give it to Him.

Will you sit with Him? Will you let God help you to heal?