The Words That Hurt the Most: How God Met Me in My Pain and Spoke Truth Over the Lies

• By candidasullivan
• June 6, 2025
• No Comments

Words have hurt me. I’ve allowed hurtful words to tear me down. Some of those words were from others, and others from me. The hardest words to overcome are the ones we say to ourselves.

One night, I sat in my laundry room while my family slept, with my back against the dryer and my face covered in tears. I was hurting over something that someone said to me. I so desperately wanted this person, and if I am being honest, every person, to love and accept me. That night, God spoke to me. He told me the love and acceptance I desperately wanted from others was inside me. Before I could ask anyone else to love and accept me, I needed to love and accept myself.

It was that easy.

My whole life, I have sought from others what I needed from myself. It’s hard to be ourselves. It’s hard to love and accept our scars—the ones visible and invisible. But in doing so, we have power over our lives.

Lord knows I am not perfect. I have scars and deep pain. Some of my scars are visible, and some are invisible. But I am the person on the inside. I am the soul. My soul doesn’t have scars.

When I can humble my heart and ask God to give me the proper perspective, then no one else has the power to hurt me. The pain comes from my thoughts anyway. I used to think I needed to fix other people and make them understand how I felt. Now, I know that I need to understand. When someone says something mean to me, it has nothing to do with me. It comes from their pain. Therefore, I am learning to give them grace and not react with pain.

When someone lashes out with painful words, it is because their pain is so great that they need a way to release some of it. If we react with anger, then we just add more pain to their already painful hearts. I have learned that responding with love and seeing their pain instead of their ugliness helps us both because we’ve all been there.

We’ve all unloaded our pain onto others at one time or another.

Sometimes, we want to fight because the pain inside feels so great inside of us. We feel we might explode if we don’t find a way to release it.

I have learned that prayer is the best way to release our pain. Jesus wants us to give Him our pain. He can handle it. So many times, in my feelings of overwhelm, I have found myself at His feet, sobbing. He understands every tear. When I yell at others or say hurtful things, it makes me feel bad. But when I talk to God, then I always feel better because He understands the groanings of my heart.